I have to put this in here because there’s nowhere else I can write it down where it would be read (and that’s the point because it’s funny) except for a regular notebook (but who uses those dinosaurs anymore?). Last night I was taking a walk around Nicole’s neighborhood with Milo, and we were lost. That has nothing to do with the story, but it’s funny, so I had to add it. And we’re talking about Tombstone and Doc Holliday, and he says, “Doc Holliday was a cool guy and all, but he had that weird incestual thing going on with his cousin.” I said, “Yes, but that happened all the time back in the day.” He said, “I know, but still…his cousin.” I said, “Yeah….” There was a brief silence, which he broke by saying, “You know, my dad thinks you look just like my cousin Melissa, and I never noticed it before, but you really do!”
I don’t want to look like his cousin. I don’t want to look like his sister. Why do people keep pointing out things like this to him? I don’t want him having these ideas! I guess there’s nothing I can do to prevent it. Cortney says we’re all related anyhow.
Sometimes I really like being up alone late at night when no one else in the whole house is awake. This is not one of those nights. There are some nights when I just feel so lonely I’m almost afraid to go to sleep. I don’t know why I used the word ‘afraid’…that’s just what came to mind. Hm…why would being lonely make me afraid to go to sleep? Shouldn’t it be the other way around? Why wouldn’t I sleep to escape from the loneliness? It’s almost as if I’m afraid of being smothered by the vastness of the emotion. I guess that doesn’t make any sense. I don’t know what I’m talking about. I just can’t go to bed yet. I didn’t want to leave Nicole’s house, but I couldn’t let the parental units worry. Besides…I have to work in the morning. Maybe that’s why I feel so lonely. I’ll have the whole office to myself for seven hours. I hate that. Especially when it’s that office. In Ponte Vedra. I only work there occasionally–it’s not my office. I don’t like working there.
Ugh…if you’ve never tried it, don’t bother attempting to count sheep. It doesn’t work. They don’t jump over the little fence thing. They run away from it. Yeah. Stupid sheep.